- July 15, 2014
- Liz Green
The Aries man is the original Knight. He's also the original male chauvinist, because you have to hit him with a veritable brick to remind him that his protection and interference may not be welcome. And you have to virtually turn him inside out to get him to notice that you can protect yourself.
Now, many women don't particularly want to protect themselves, or they are smart enough to know that they can do it quietly without bruising that rather fragile Arien ego. No question about it, Aries has an eggshell ego, to use the phrase coined by Beata Bishop in Below the Belt. He's as male as male can be: the original macho man. He often feels obliged to keep this image up even when he doesn't feel very macho: knights get tired too, and cranky, and hurt, and vulnerable, but there too, you never hear about it. Nobody ever describes Sir Lancelot when he has a head cold and needs cosseting. So the Aries man often pushes himself beyond his own limits trying so hard to be the ideal image of male. It helps him a lot to relax and recognize that he's human too. But Aries has a lot of difficulty acknowledging his own humanity, because he's so caught up in the world of myth.
He's capable of alternating between grand gestures of generosity that are downright poetic and hard to beat, and some pretty crude insensitivity and trampling of others' feelings. When he's bad-tempered, he doesn't realize how he can injure others who are more sensitive, and when he's on his hobby-horse, he expects everybody around to believe so totally in what he's doing that they should drop their own goals and visions. But if you do believe in his dreams, he's an unflinching friend and will defend you and protect you literally to the grave.
What you may have to suffer most with an Aries man is the queer feeling that the goddess he worships, the princess he adores, is some vague glimmering figure just behind your left shoulder. When you try to tell him you're human, individual, he often can't see. Aries is prone to idealization of women. The Eternal Feminine is very much a reality to him, and he perceives and generally loves it as well as desiring it. But the individual personal qualities of a particular woman are not always so noticeable. He generally likes what he considers to be feminine women, and he's inclined to stereotype them, just as he's inclined to stereotype himself into the macho-role. It's hard to bring him down to earth enough to let the outlines of two people emerge from all the mythologizing. And sometimes - if he's a more extreme fiery type - the outline of the real person is disturbing, and can send him off on the next quest. It's easier to be in love with an ideal image than a real woman, because the real woman needs to be related to as an individual. That means slowing down and seeing, considering, feeling, adjusting. We've already mentioned that Aries is not particularly gifted at the art of adjustment.
With Aries, there's no lack of passion. And no lack of romance either. This isn't generally a once-every-Saturday-at-ten man. Aries can be a Don Juan or a Casanova, but he certainly isn't a quotidian lover. You must appreciate his romance and play to it. Too much realism kills his fire, and too much routine crushes his spirit.
Aries likes to sweep women off their feet. This may be basic and physical, or it may be subtle or intellectual. He also loves to play Pygmalion - change you, create you, fill you with his ideas, stimulate your intellect. Many Aries men love to believe that they begin with unshaped clay and create a goddess. Pygmalion was undoubtedly an Aries. Once again, if you're strongly feminist, this can be annoying.
If you're comfortable with yourself and don't need to prove the point, it can be amusing, charming, touching, endearing, and still annoying. The trouble with being the object of Pygmalion's endeavours is that, while you retain the shape he's sculpted, he's fine; but if you develop any ornament or quality which wasn't in his design, he can be hurt and offended and, yes, threatened.
The truth is that Aries is a very vulnerable sign when it comes to relationships with women. There is an amusing film which Clint Eastwood starred in and directed called Every Which Way But Loose. The hero, like all Clint Eastwood heroes, is the original macho man - who is tough but sensitive, strong but poetic, able to beat all the bad guys but still capable of tenderness towards old ladies and pets and able to appreciate the scent of summer flowers. He's completely duped and mashed about by a hooker disguised as damsel-in-distress. She looks so frail, so needful, so injured, so abused. She really wants a little money and then a quick farewell. His look of baffled injury at the end of the film is a classic Arien look. Yet it's his own lack of insight, and his blind persistence in taking the feminine at face value as an image rather than seeing and understanding the actual woman, that is responsible for the mess. Because he's so vulnerable to Woman, he often has to be a little heavy-handed to women. This is a paradox peculiar to the fiery signs, and in particular to Aries.
On the other hand, the Aries man has one superb quality which should be emphasized again and again. He loves change, and that includes changing himself. Although capable of arrogance, petulance and downright bloody-mindedness, he's never complacent. This means that, if he can understand that a relationship is a thing which grows and changes and needs insight and attention, he'll happily make that his cause. And then you get all the benefit of the best side of the Knight in Shining Armour. And they are, truly, sadly needed these days.
Source Astrology for Lovers